Poor Does Not Equal Less

Poor Does Not Equal LessI am poor (in money).  That does not make me less of a person.

I am soon to be homeless.  That does not mean I don’t have hopes and dreams and feelings just like you.

If I walk into your office to ask for help, please know that it took me hours of crying and praying and discussion before I could finally get the courage to set up the appointment, let alone walk in.  Please don’t treat me like just another number, or worse, like I am a criminal just because I am asking for your help.

the mathematical sign for unequalIf you see me in line at the food bank, don’t assume that I’m lazy.  I am currently working three jobs, while still trying to hold together a marriage and co-parent two children, both of whom have emotional problems.

If you run into me at the movies or a restaurant, don’t assume I am wasting money and no wonder I’m poor.  I have become the queen of coupons, special deals and promoting.  I could be mystery shopping or doing a review for a sponsor.

Believe it or not, I have a life, a very satisfying one, that has nothing to do with being poor, or nearly homeless. I have friends and family whom I love and enjoy spending time with.  I have a career I am proud of and sometimes I want to pinch myself for how lucky I am.  Being poor is just one small part of me.  It does not make me less of a person.

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20 thoughts on “Poor Does Not Equal Less

  1. This is so true. I have been in that place. Each of us are probably only a check or two away from it. We cannot fall into the mindset of judging people by their financial status. That is not who they are simply where they are (and most time sit is only temporary). Thank you so much for sharing this truth.

  2. I have a lot to say about this, because I’ve never felt poor (although I am), and poverty is one of the greatest enemies AND companions in my life. One thing I want to share though, is the feeling of being comparatively rich. Some people where I live LOVE returning to their homeland because when they are there, they are treated “better,” as “rich-brother-from-America.” It’s funny how richness and poorness is truly relative, and somehow less meaningful because of its relativity. My favorite reminder regarding the matter of my own poverty is simply: “Someone is happier with LESS than you have.” That helps me immensely. I’ve also learned over the years how easy it is to look rich in kindness. I turn that on whenever I need to deal with condescending tones and eyes, and in my experience, I help myself feel on their level, regardless of what they may think of me.

    1. Thank you for sharing, Yvonne!! You’re right, I know lots of rich people who are unhappy and I am learning to be happy with what I have instead of worrying about what I don’t.

  3. We are completely broke right now. Actually in the hole until payday. My parents have helped us over and over, but it is time for us to figure this out on our own. I have a possible solution, but it is a great dig to my husband’s pride. I am hoping we can get this figured out and get back on track.

    1. Hi Rabia –
      I have been in your shoes so many times I’ve lost count. Fortunately, our situation is starting to turn around. I pray that your family will find the answers you need soon.

  4. You are doing an amazing job doing whatever you can in these difficult times. I don’t think anyone would judge you if they knew your story and many may be in a similar situation. Things have to turn around for the better soon. Good luck and happy SITS Day.

  5. You are rich in spirit; and when all is said and done, that is what matters most. You are a fighter and you know how to roll with the punches, so you will always be just fine. 😉

  6. And now again this is more than a year and you’ve got me curious. After work, I will pop back and see how life is going for you now. Thanks for the blog. Well written. We do try to be so strong and do things for ourselves when we might be able to use some well deserved help.

  7. what an insightful post! Yes, I have taken up on some of the roles mentioned here in the past, so I totally do understand your thoughts… God Bless! Happy SITS day 🙂

  8. Beautifully said. In our twenty-three years of marriage, my husband has been laid off 11 times. My health does not allow me to work. Without help from others, we wouldn’t have made it. As horrible as it is to need it, I am grateful for it.

    I hope things have turned around for you and your family since you wrote this post.

  9. I am totally agree with this thoughts, but we need to prove our self in order that we can compete with the judgement of our society.. There’s no poor and less to a person who are to work for greatness…

  10. You are so true, it doesn’t equal less. It’s sad that sometimes society makes us feel less. I can tell you’re a strong woman. But take it from one strong woman to the next, it’s also OK to be weak too!

  11. Teressa, this is very touching. Especially when times are tough, we need diversion in the form of entertainment to keep up morale.

    Anyone who treats you unkindly is likely feeling guilty about some aspect of their own lives.

    Take care and keep writing. It’s wonderful therapy and your insights are appreciated.

    1. Thank you Mandie!! It always helps to know that someone else has made it through to the other side. Hopefully we’ll be there soon!!

  12. WOW! I am tearing up as I read this. It’s like we’re the same person. We are also needing help (financially) and it takes all the courage in the world every time I need to send proof of our income in to our “case worker”.

    I am a very proud mom of 4, and married to the most wonderful man in the world. But we just need help, and I feel the stares of everyone too. My family doesn’t know how “poor” we are, and when they ask us to help purchase something (like a professional family portrait session!!) they look at us and wonder why the he** we can’t help pay.

    It’s embarrassing. And it’s stressful when those you think are your friends treat you differently because you can’t go out or just purchase what you want.

    So I feel your pain. I feel your frustration. People need to get their heads out of their butts and see us as real; as people with feelings; as EQUAL!

    1. Samantha – thank you for your comment!! I’m sorry you are going through this too. Don’t be too proud to tell your family. The support of our family and friends (financially or spiritually) is one of the reasons we have been able to get through this. We will survive!!

      1. My husbands family knows. Each of my 3 brothers have their own business and they are VERY well off. It would be embarrassing to tell them, especially since each of their wives are kind of “snooty.” My husbands family, on the other hand, knows and they try to help where they can. But they are from a farming community, and there’s the big difference. Yes, we will survive, but like you put it, being poor (financially) does not make us less of a person. I’d rather have my wonderful kids and hubby and be “poor” than have all the money in the world and be “rich”. My definition of being rich is having my family by my side with God watching over us. We are here for each other!!

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