I had a dream.  A big dream.  And I want you to know about it.   You might think I’m crazy, but I am claiming God’s promise to me and my family and the only way to do that is to tell everyone about it.

About a month ago, I dreamed that I was pregnant.  Pregnancy is physically impossible for me, but we all know that dreams are symbolic. Dreammoods.com says: to dream that you are pregnant symbolizes an aspect of yourself or some aspect of your personal life that is growing and developing. You may not be ready to talk about it or act on it. Being pregnant in your dream may also represent the birth of a new idea, direction, project or goal.

Now, as most of my readers are aware, things have not been too great financially for the Morris Family over the past 2-3 years.  Both Art and I have felt that this time of trial has been preparation for something awesome that God has in store for us.  This dream confirmed that for me.  But there was something extra special about it.  In the dream, I was 8 months pregnant.  That means the delivery is soon.  Maybe even this week.  I am so excited to see what God has in store for us!!

Over the past month we have been hit harder than ever.  First Bud got food poisoning, then Boo, Art and I all got bad colds, which for me turned into a day in bed with the nebulizer.  Our short sell fell through, but by the next day we had a buyer.  My emotions have been on an hourly rollercoaster ride that has been sheerly exhausting.  Even with the dream in my memory, it has still been very difficult to retain my hope.

Merriam-Webster defines hope this way: to expect with confidence.  Well, I’m sorry to say my confidence has been shaky at best.  But Romans 5: 3-5 reminds us: we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

I asked Art the other day “What if it doesn’t get better?”  And he reminded me that it always gets better.  We just have to have faith.  So I’m trying to take my hope to the next level.  Because faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. (Hebrews 11:1)

So after a few nights of nightmares, two nights ago I had another dream.  I was walking down a country lane talking to God.  He said He knew that I had had a hard time lately, so he wanted to send me a sign to make me feel better; to help me see that our situation was about to get better.  I looked to my right and saw a blue balloon tied to a mailbox.  That was my symbol of hope.  In my dream I felt so honored that God sent me that little symbol.  I instantly relaxed and started enjoying the beautiful scenery around me.  As I approached the end of the lane, I turned a corner and all of a sudden, there were hundreds of blue balloons filling the sky.  It still makes me cry just thinking about it.

Please hope with me.  Have faith with me.  Our dream is about to be.  I believe.

It’s no secret that my family has been through some rough times over the past couple of years.  We have dealt with the failure of a business, bankruptcy, unemployment, cyberbullying, and other issues which I hope to deal with in future blog posts.

Through it all I have managed to hold on to my hope.  I remember Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you.  Plans to prosper you — not to harm you.  Plans for hope and a future.”  Sometimes I wonder how long I will have to wait for God’s promises to come true, but we can talk about my lack of patience some other time, LOL.

For a long time after events took a bad turn I have wondered what we were doing wrong and why was God punishing us? I felt almost paralyzed with the fear that if I did the wrong thing we would never get out of the mess we were in.  Maybe we would wander around stuck in the same loop like the Israelites did on their way to the Promised Land.

Then, while reading Renee Swope‘s A Confident Heart, I was reminded of the story of Simon Peter.  As Renee says, “His biggest failure came the night of Jesus’ arrest, when Peter denied he even knew him, three times.”  But despite Peter’s failures, He was also “the rock” on which the early church was built.  “There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” (Romans 8:1)

I slowly came to the realization that if I never tried a new direction, I would never be able to move on.  That God was not punishing us for our mistakes, nor does He judge us by them.  Through God’s grace and the resurrection of His son, Jesus Christ, we are redeemed.  If we sin, or try and fail, God forgives us, and helps us to see the way to make things better the next time.  His love is unconditional and He would rather have us try and fail and try again than to hide our light “under a basket” (Matthew 5:15)

In the past few weeks I have had the courage to commit to this blog.  I hope that it has helped my readers as much as it has helped me.  I finally feel like I am able to “let my light shine.”

How are you letting your light shine?  Please let me know in a comment.