The Hardest Decision I Ever Made

I am currently participating in an online Bible study through Proverbs 31 ministries.  In the current study we are reading the book The Best Yes, by Lysa Terkeurst.

My favorite verse in the study so far is this one:

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3: 5-6, NIV)

Something Lysa says in the book really hit home with me the past few weeks while I was struggling with a difficult decision.

The fear of making a wrong decision shouldn’t strip the faith right out of our faith. The only way our faith will ever strengthen is for us to use it.

So I struggled with my decision some more, and I prayed about it.  I prayed long and hard.  I asked God to show me the right decision.

Looking back, I realize that I was paralyzed by fear.  Fear of the outcome of my decision.  Fear of how that decision would affect the other members of my family.

hardest decision I ever made
photo courtesy of

But the truth was, my refusal to make a decision, was STILL a decision.  And that failure to act was causing a great deal of strife to the same people I was trying to protect.

Finally, my hand was forced.  I made the hard decision.

The minute it happened, I knew it was the best decision I ever made.  And the hardest.

I cried.  A lot.  Not sure how many were tears of relief and how many were tears of sorrow (probably 50/50 to  be honest).  But the empowerment and self-respect I gained by making that hard decision were immeasurable.

(No, I will not tell you what the decision was, but don’t worry – it was not related to my marriage!!)

What was the hardest decision you ever made and/or how did it make you feel?

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