Use Your Words

use your words

When Boo was little, she went to my Aunt Carol’s house for daycare while I was at work. There was a little girl there, Candace, who liked to hit when she got angry.  Often I would enter the house to pick up Boo and see Aunt Carol talking to Candace, who was sitting in the corner.  Aunt Carol was usually saying “Use your words, Candace.  Use your words.”

As adults, we still sometimes have a problem knowing how to act when negative emotions overwhelm us. A few of us may still lash out physically (hopefuly, a very few).  Some of us use our words as a weapon to retaliate against those who we believe have hurt us.  And some of us shut down and either refuse to talk or just can’t seem to get the words out.

If you’re one of the people in the first category – please go back to the end of the first paragraph, and may I also highly recommend anger management classes?  Physical violence is not the answer.

If you are a person who uses their words as a weapon, think before you speak.  Many times we filter current conversations through past experiences.  For example, you were excluded from play groups as a child, so when your invitation goes missing for an event all your friends were invited to, you assume you were deliberately left out.  Art said this to me once and we have passed it along to our kids: “You know that I love you and I would never deliberately hurt your feelings.” So before you lash out or “strike back” think if what you are hearing or experiencing is actually what the other person intended.

For those of us who “shut down” (myself included), “use your words” is still good advice.  Sometimes, taking a walk to clear your head will help you think more clearly.  If you can’t verbalize what’s wrong, try to describe your feelings.  Are you scared, angry, hurt?

At least if you express your feelings, that is a starting place to begin a dialogue.  Another great quote from Art is “How can I know what’s going on in your head if you don’t tell me?”

Aunt Carol’s advice of “Use your words” is sound advice for all of us, adults and kids.


Curse of the Egyptian Goddess Book Review and Interview with Author Lisa Rayns

Title: Curse of the Egyptian Goddess

Author: Lisa Rayns

Genre: Urban Mythology

Publisher: Lisa Rayns

Release Date: August 2011

Format: Kindle/Paperback

Pages: 157 pages

About the Book:

Given her ten-year curse that leaves her beaten and bruised, Emma Patrix has grown accustomed to drinking away the pain. And with a trail of dead bodies behind her, it was only a matter of time before the law caught up.

Now she’s accused of murder and she must flee the country to find the one man who can help her break the curse-Calvin Konrad. She finally catches up with him in Egypt, but he’s not the same sweet boy she remembers from her childhood. And getting him to help her proves more difficult than she ever imagined.



I am a mild Egypt buff (have seen the King Tut exhibit twice) and have always been fascinated by the era of pharaohs, pyramids and the pantheon of ancient Egyptian religion, so I really looked forward to reading this book.  The novella was such a fun read.  It’s not deep or thought-provoking, but it contains just the right amount of light banter, sexual tension and suspense to be thoroughly entertaining. I especially enjoyed the twists and turns the story took.

About the Author:

Lisa Rayns lives in a small town in South Dakota. She gave up working with explosives to write paranormal romance and urban fantasy novels, so her occupation hasn’t changed much. When she isn’t writing, she enjoys spending time with her family and two adorable Siamese cats.


An Interview with Lisa Rayns:

TM: Your niche seems to be the paranormal and vampires. Curse of the Egyptian Goddess is an urban fantasy. What gave you the idea and did you enjoy the change of pace?

LR: I flourish in the vampire realm but with the novella I wanted to fully test the waters in Indy publishing. This gave me a lot of freedom to be creative. I had also just finished a psychology paper on Cleopatra so my mind settled on an Egyptian curse. I really did enjoy the change of pace and I don’t believe any writer should be bogged down to one genre. Romance, however, is a high priority for me. Without it, what’s the point? hehe

TM: What is your “other” job?  How do you balance writing with your roles as parent, spouse and employee?

LR: I’m a full-time author, mother, and wife. My family has been so supportive and helpful. When I decided to write the novella my kids said a story about an Egyptian curse would be cool. Helpful, right?

TM: What is your best advice for getting past writer’s block?

LR: Movies. Honestly, take a break if your mind is telling you to take a break. I watch movies that interest me until my brain says, “Shut the darn TV off and go back to writing!” It works for me. I can only watch so much before I need my laptop again.

TM: Please tell me about your upcoming projects.

LR: Oh, this is my favorite part! Wanted: Vampire – Free Blood: is ready to go and I’m awaiting the release date from the publisher. I’m working on the second book in this series while another stand-alone novel of mine is being reviewed by the publisher. I have a short story in the anthology Cupid Painted Blind which will be out this month. I even have a psychological thriller in the works if I ever make it back to that.

Thanks so much for having me on your blog today and reviewing my novella!
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I was not compensated in any way for this review.  I did receive a review copy of the book.  However, my opinions are my own.